As I dropped my child at kinder, every parent’s worst nightmare was unfolding

There was also the shocking case of a three-year-old girl who suffered such poor hygiene and neglect at her Sydney day care – her nappy was changed so infrequently that she held her urine all day – that she will likely need a kidney transplant. And the list goes on.

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Working parents already face a range of agonising decisions when weighing up whether to place their children into paid care. There are considerations about sleep, diet, socialisation, educational programming and how much outdoor space there is for their precious little bodies to move and play and grow. Their safety should be a given. But on weeks like these, we are reminded that even that cannot, should not, be taken for granted.

When scenarios beyond our worst imagination strike at the institutions where parents, already ridden with guilt, leave our children, suddenly, nothing in life feels safe.

Of course, this country is blessed with thousands of incredible day care centres and educators who play a vital role in shaping young minds and enabling parents to work. The government has benchmarks for child protection that every accredited centre must meet, and moves are already afoot to strengthen these. And still, sometimes things are missed, terrible mistakes happen.

Yesterday afternoon, I collected my child, gave her a tighter-than-usual squeeze, then tried my best to go about our evening routine as normal. We went to the library and ate tacos, her little face blissfully unaware of the horrors unfolding a few kilometres away. I counted myself lucky, and thought of the parents who last night couldn’t say the same thing. I tucked her into bed, went downstairs, made a tea, and just cried.

Sally, a parent at a Point Cook centre where Brown worked perhaps put it best when she told this masthead, “Now I’m blaming myself that … maybe I shouldn’t work … you think it’s the safest place to drop them, but no, it’s not.”

Was there a part of me that felt slightly shaky at the prospect of sending her to day care again this morning? I’d be lying if I said no, but realise it is something I will likely overcome with time. Because, for many of us, there is no choice. If only it was so simple for the children and parents who have been directly involved. Their nightmare is far from over.

Melissa Singer is associate editor of Sunday Life magazine.

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