Each week, Dr Kirstin Ferguson tackles questions on workplace, career and leadership in her advice column, Got a Minute? This week: escalating differences between colleagues, a career pivot in your 50s, and managing the unmanageable.
When youβve acknowledged wrongdoing and accepted responsibility, is it time to draw a line under a workplace incident?Credit: Dionne Gain
Several weeks ago, I was involved in a workplace incident in which I reacted inappropriately during a conversation with a colleague. I acknowledge that my behaviour at that time was unprofessional, and I have taken full responsibility. I have proactively expressed my remorse, engaged with my supervisor respectfully, and offered and submitted a formal written apology. However, despite these efforts, my colleague has declined mediation, is now seeking conditions that resemble restrictions similar to an AVO, is limiting my movements at work, and is making further allegations. I am extremely distressed by these developments and concerned that this situation may escalate into formal proceedings which could have a lasting impact on my wellbeing, professional standing and reputation. What can I do?
Itβs understandable that youβre feeling distressed. Youβve taken all the right steps since the incident you outline by acknowledging your part, offering a formal apology, co-operating fully with your supervisor, and maintaining professionalism despite the emotional strain. I can imagine you feel frustrated that your efforts to make amends are met not being with resolution, but with escalating allegations.
I would strongly encourage you to seek independent advice if you havenβt already done so β either from your HR representative (in writing, to document your concerns clearly), an employee assistance program (EAP), or external legal advice, if necessary. Itβs important you also look after your own mental health right now. Document every interaction factually, keep records of your positive conduct, and continue holding yourself to the professional standards youβve already shown.
Iβm in my late 50s and have run my own yoga studio for the past 20 years. The pandemic really disrupted the momentum in our sector and as I head towards retirement, Iβm thinking about what other types of work might be suitable. Running a studio is no longer financially viable. I donβt have a degree, but I do have a lot of business skill. Iβm also after a high degree of flexibility (no pun intended) in working hours which suits our lifestyle as my partner is about to retire himself. What is your advice?
Firstly, I really admire the journey youβve been on. Running your own studio for 20 years is no small achievement. The great news is you already have a highly transferable skill set: business management, customer service, financial oversight, community building, and probably a strong sense of emotional intelligence.
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You might find opportunities in areas like small business consulting, coaching or mentoring (particularly for other wellness practitioners), freelance administration support, or even contract work in business development or customer experience roles. Plenty of businesses value experience over formal degrees, especially in roles where maturity, relationship management, and strategic thinking are key. Start by thinking about what you enjoy most β is it teaching, mentoring, organising, building relationships? From there, you can narrow in on roles that offer the flexibility youβre after while tapping into your natural strengths.
In my team we have a staff member who is extremely difficult and absorbs a disproportionate amount of my time to manage. They are unable to manage feedback and respond with over-the-top, emotional responses. Others in the team feel psychologically vulnerable given the history this person has of responding when someone says something. How do I manage a person like this when their personality is fundamentally at odds with the supportive yet hard-working culture we have carefully built up in our workplace?
